Needy Child

So, I admit that I am a very needy child. I am completely okay with admitting it. When people ignore me, I have a huge problem with that. Mostly because I'm very insecure. Like my friends, if I don't talk to them very often, I start to think that I am going to lose them. In fact most of the time I am just waiting for my friends to tell me to leave them alone and get the hell out of their life. I don't feel like I'm actually part of anybody's circle of friends. I feel like the outsider that is trying too hard to fit in. I just expect people to drop me like flies. Especially the friends that I don't get to see every often. They're the ones that I feel the closest to and yet so far away from. I mean, those are the ones that I expect to drop me as a friend the most out of everybody. I feel that way because I know that I am very pushy with wanting to talk to them. It's completely their fault ;P Cause they are like my happy pills and always can bring a smile to my face no matter how bad a mood I am. I know that I can be annoying, selfish, self-centered, annoying, and mean sometimes all of those at once to people! I have never been good at censoring myself, and yet I can censor myself quite well. Sometimes I remember "oh wait I can't say that because they might get mad and stop talking to me" "Oh wait I can't say that, they'll think I'm a psycho" I censor myself as most teenagers do, to fit in. That's why I'm so quiet. Most of the time I can't say anything that is censored enough for everyone around. Actually the real reason I'm so quiet is because I don't want to be made fun of. Basically everything I say I get made fun of. One of my best friends, which I don't know why she puts up with me, says the dumbest most strangest things ever and she gets made fun of all the time. So even though I don't get made fun of very often for what I say anymore, I see first hand people making fun of her for saying things that I would say. I got off topic there though!

IM A NEEDY CHILD and I think all my friends are going to leave me someday. THE END OF STORY.