Glooms

Well all I want to do right now is curl up in a ball and bawl my eyes out. I really don't want to go to school tomorrow. I really don't want to go to school ever again. I don't want to face people ever again actually. I just want to be left alone. I want to feel fine. I want to be okay, but I'm not. There's something wrong with me and I don't want other people to know about it. It's getting to big though. All I want to do is cry and cry and cry. You probably know how hard it is not to cry when that's all you want to do. Crying isn't going to help me feel better, and yet that's all I want to do.
I don't want to work on my homework. I am stressing about everything. I am super depressed but don't feel like taking the medication I am not even supposed to have anymore. I really wish I was okay. I really wish I could face people without feeling the urge to cry, but every time I have looked someone in the eye today all I wanted to do was burst out crying. My emotions are on overload again, and I need break to hurry up and get here before I break more than I already am broken.
I'm just a broken record and I don't know how much longer I will be able to continue on this way. I need a break from school.....I need a break from people.....I need to be left alone so I can get control of myself.
I have to do homework though. I have to talk with people everyday. I have to pretend like everything is okay. I have to go to the one place that I feel my life slipping away from me at. I have to go to the place that just makes me more and more depressed. I have to ignore what I need. I have to be the person people expect me to me. I need to be saved from myself now. I need to be saved from everyone. There's no one to save me though because everyone else has their own problems to deal with. No one cares about the problems that I am having. No one cares that I am on the edge of survival. That I keep falling down and no one is there to pick me back up.