Well. My mood is sinking lower and lower with each day. I blame my NaNoWriMo story for being so depressing. Even thought it's a great way to get my feelings out, it still is very depressing. I just had to write about this girl cutting her arms open and enjoying it. I haven't ever cut myself so how am I supposed to know what it's like? I'm doing good on NaNoWriMo at least. If I haven't gotten 5,000 words in these first two days I will be surprised. I haven't a clue where my flashdrive is right now though so I can't finish typing up what I wrote for today and updating my word count....oh well I think I'm doing great. I really want to reach 50,000 words this year.
So today my friend lied to me. It's not that she just lied to me. It's that I found out from one of my other friends that she lied to me about this guy that she had met, from IL. I'm the one with guys in IL, but that's not the point. She told me how sweet he was and that she was going to go see him this weekend. She did this because she doesn't want guys throwing themselves at her and she doesn't want to be seen as a Lesbo. She lied to me about this. She really had me going and she wasn't going to tell me that he wasn't real. My other friend had to tell me! So that's one thing I must say darkened my mood today.
Another one is this stupid thing called Smartmusic. I absolutely HATE it. I don't understand why we have to use it. Smart Music is a computer program that tells you how to play pretty much. My teacher expects me to go in after school and play on Smart Music because we have homework on there. I don't always have time to do that! So what if I don't have time to go do the homework? We can't do it at home because who is going to go buy smart music for $30 and then a microphone and stuff? NO ONE. anyways, smart music sucks because it doesn't even detect most notes and when it does it decides that most of them are wrong. When they aren't! So I am rather annoyed with SmartMusic, though I can't say that I really care. Smart Music can suck it. I don't see why anyone would want to use it.
Oh and I keep getting told I suck at Clarinet and Cello. Do you know how that feels? To be told you suck at what you love doing. It hurts A L O T. I get told this everyday and everyday I have to just ignore them and shrug it off. Well guess what, It's getting harder and harder to do that! I hate playing in Orchestra and Band now because the people in it are making me feel like shit. What happened to my band being a family? Was that only during Marching Band? where did the fun go....
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